Spice!
by TwoAsiansOnCrack
Summary: "Why? I can get every other girl I want. I'm a master at my art. So why! Why doesn't she want me?" Based on the song 'Spice' by Len Kagamine. Len is a playboy who can get any girl, except the only one he actually wants. Adult themes. Angsty one-shot.


If you've heard the song 'Spice!' by the Vocaloid Len Kagamine, this is what I imagine him to feel like in the song. A short summary is : Len is a playboy, but he's in love with Rin, who doesn't want him.

Disclaimer: I don't own Vocaloids or the song Spice!.

This contains very mature language and mild adult themes. So be forewarned!

Also contains slight Miku bashing. I LOVE HATSUNE MIKU. So please don't hate.

Written solely by Christian Jaw.

* * *

What on _earth _could it be?

I gaze at the picture of her – _her, _who is perfect, _her, _who is gorgeous, _her, _the only girl in the whole entire world that I want. Why? Why do I? Don't I have any control? What on earth attracts me to her, besides her gold hair, her eyes, the way she smiles my God I have to stop thinking about her like that. God fuckin' damn it. This whole things is entirely fucked up. Fuckity fuck fuck mcfuck fuck. I don't want Rin. Ah, what the hell? What. The. Hell. I shouldn't be lying to myself. I've been after her for a long time.

The glass of vodka in my hands trembles violently, and I settle it down upon the table, looking blearily at her picture. Why? I can get every other girl I want. I'm a master at my art. So why! _Why doesn't she want me?_

I've prided myself with the ability to get all girls. It's not a big deal. Get in, learn their interests – stalk them online beforehand if you must – flatter them. Presents? Girls like teddy bears, roses, diamonds, and sex. Especially the last one, if you must, because they crave it, once they realize they like you.

But do I?

No. I only want it from one girl, and there's only one girl I'll give my spice to.

I think back to the day I saw her go on a date with _him. _God damn that cocky blue haired bastard. I hope he dies.

Wait, no. I don't want him to die. I'm not that evil.

…Actually, I take that back. I hope he suffers a miserable fucking death. A part of my mind wonders how strong this vodka is, and I smile and run my fingers through my golden hair, my glorious, lady-snatching, girl-fackin' hair.

The doorbell rings, and the sound hurts my ears. I groan loudly before stumbling drunkenly – actually, I think I'm holding my liquor quite well today – and opening the door.

I see a flash of neon green-blue hair, that trails to her knees, and a familiar smile. Who the _hell_ is this girl? I know I've seen her somewhere. Ah. But the fact that she knows my address means I must of done her sometime recent. Cool. Maybe it's just what I need to cheer myself up out of this dark hell hole.

"Muh?" I hear someone say, and I realize it's me. God, I sound hideous. Not a turn-on to the ladies. They like the low, deep growling voice. A second later, I realize that I'm drunk, thus causing me to not give a damn.

"Oh, Len! What have you done to yourself? Oh, you poor darling." She hugs me and I pat her slowly on the back. I just want her to go away. I really don't need an annoying girl right now. "You poor darling." She pinches my cheek and I mutter something incomprehensible. "Don't worry Len! Miku-miku will take care of you," she coos to me, and leads me inside. Her babytalk annoys me, and her name is Miku. Yeah. Miku. I remember her name now. She's quite good at freaking.

I realize that she shouldn't be in my apartment building. It's a mess, but Rin is out on vacation with her fucking blue haired bastard. In the three days that she's been gone so far, the entire apartment has turned into a fucking pigsty, while also revealing my incompetent ability to clean.

"Miku, I dun need company right now," I say dully. She picks up the empty bottle of vodka and looks at me severely.

"Len, have you been drinking again?" she asks quietly, setting down the empty bottle before noticing several other full bottles in a plastic grocery bag. I contemplate lying, but what the hell. This girl means nothing to me.

"Course, Miku. Don't you know me well enough?"

"Are you planning to drink yourself to death?" Her tone is casual. I wonder how many guys she's slept with.

"Maybe."

"Typical." She takes a new bottle of whiskey that I bought and cracks it open before pouring me a cup, and I smile. My type of girl, you know. "Cheers," she says happily and clinks her glass against mine before downing it. A pleasant buzz fills my head, and the fun begins.

* * *

I wake up, my head throbbing with a great deal of pain. Lights blur, and my entire body is heavy. I groan loudly and throw up beside my bed and turn around only to face a girl.

Holy crap. I nearly cry out with alarm, but I remember from somewhere this girl is named Miku. She's sleeping peacefully. God, what did I do last night?

Probably her.

Ugh. I sit up and rub my temples, which is not helping to ease the pain, and I glance at her. She seems to be perfectly content to be done in by a guy that barely knows her…! She opens her eyes as I poke her cheek, and she smiles at me.

"You didn't ditch me in the morning this time," she says in wonder. Well, no shit. She's in _my_ house, and I was _drunk_. I can only grin back weakly, and I stumble nakedly into the bathroom. Brushing my teeth seems like a good idea.

The door opens quietly, and there, standing in the doorway, is Rin. She gazes at me, and I gaze back at her, while I brush my teeth buck naked. Rin looks appalled as she drops her trunk in the doorway and peers at the mess I've made in our apartment.

I continue to brush my teeth.

She comes back in quietly. "How many times, Len, have I told you not to invite random girls over?"

Responding with a noncommittal grunt seems like the best option at the moment, so that's exactly what I do. She seems frustrated, and stomps her feet in that adorable way that I love so much.

I spit out my toothpaste and put on a robe, and gaze at her. She's perfect for me! If only she knew…

"Rin," I begin.

"Yes, Len?" she replies, picking up a dirty towel and tossing it into a basket.

"I really don't know anything about love, but what we have feels just right."

Rin looks surprised for a moment, and then collects herself. My head throbs with the hangover and the pressure of admitting my true feelings – well, sort of, anyway. She may not take it the right way, and my feelings may be completely fucked up at the moment, but that's how I feel. Rin smiles, and I smile.

"Thank you, Len."

* * *

Reviews are greatly appreciated.

Do you think it fits the song?


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